Ugly Shoes


It’s been a while since I did a good rant and frankly, I could not help myself after seeing what is easily the world’s ugliest creation in footwear history. As someone that is trying to see men wearing better shoes, monstrosities such as these only serve to make my life harder. And it would appear that year after year, one of the big sports shoe brands is trying to one-up the other by making an even uglier shoe than the previous. Last year it was one of Adidas’ x Yeezy amoeba-looking shoes, and now this seashell x soccer shoe that looks like it comes from some planet in a far-off galaxy. I am already dreading what 2024 will bring!


Ugly Shoes


This was a collaboration between Botter x Reebok x HP to make the half seashell / half soccer cleat platform sneaker that is 3D printed by HP. I like when brands get together, but I mean, are they just taking the piss with these? There is no functionality-serving purpose with these and it is quite unfathomable that someone would find these attractive. Of course, as I say that, I recall actually spotting someone in Soho wearing a pair the other day. Not sure if they were paid to do so as they simply don’t seem real or look natural. Looking at them makes me feel like I am watching some sci-fi fantasy movie set in the year 3034 in the galaxy of Seashellonia where alien creatures have commandeered the feet of the locals as a parasitical attack.


Ugly Shoes


While nothing surprises me anymore, I just ask myself ‘why’? Why must fashion try so hard to just be ridiculous? It’s not even mind-boggling anymore, it’s just sad. Where did taste go?

Sometimes, I wish these brands would just say no. I love Reebok. I have like 5 pairs of the classics. And feel that they come from a good heritage. The founder would be rolling in his grave for sure if he saw these. I guess integrity has gone out the door in exchange for power and money. And this is what is created because of that. But what is even crazier is the fact that people will probably wear these. And ultimately that is what blows my mind the most. Where has the world gone?!

All images courtesy of Reebok


Ugly Shoes

18 thoughts on “The Ugliest Shoes Ever Made – 2023 Edition”

  1. Looks like they started with the theme of ‘grandma’ slippers and then had too many glasses of wine. Tragic use of a mold.

  2. I’m waiting for the first soccer player to wear this on the red carpet with a black tie ensemble, shiny dinner jacket & sport watch in a price range of my car to my house šŸ™‚

  3. The difference between style and fashion is that style will last a lot longer than fashion; fashion is used to discredit what you already have so you can go out and buy something new. (Andrew Ramroop, Tailor)

    By the way: The only time in my more than 50 year a woman on the street complimented me on my shoes, i was wearing a pair of Justins Blue Ridge button boots.
    Will not happen with these kind of “sneakers”.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *